Wednesday, August 25, 2010

About breaking stereotypes.

I cringe when Kolkatabashis  look at me with a snobbish attitude when I feign ignorance about discussing theater and cinema. I had written this one a while back for all the Probashis here who have still not outgrown their love of the decade that they migrated from their beloved Kolkata. They seem to stay frozen in time, rolling their eyes at the new band music or even Hindi songs being played in Durgapuja. The irony here is that their children seem to thrive on Bollywood music and walk away from the auditorium when they hear All India Radio artists crooning songs they have not heard before.
Growing up all over the country , I have come across all sorts of names Bangalis give to people from different parts of the country. As JAP points out , we have a name for everyone. I was born in Bihar and raised in Andhra. So I have heard the term Hindustani quite often. The relatives always used to say that we live in Madras(anyone from the south of India was from Madras).


The Probasi Bangali
 Let me tell you a bit about me –the Probasi Bangali
A ‘kaalchaar’ less brute- maybe a huge anomaly
Born in the green belt and grown in the plateaus
For the Kolkatabasi –I can be as well from ghetto.

I love to watch Ray but need a dose of Amitabh too
I can read Bankim and can grasp my Premchand too
Kurusova’s cinematography I might not fathom
Even Karan Johar movies I find really dumb.

The Rabindrik dance will never be my favorite style,
But Ananda Shankar’s moves always bring a smile.
Jibananda’s poetry-I will never get the gist of it
But Sukumar Ray’s Abol tabol is my all time favorite .


I love my mishtis but sneak away from my machher jhol
That’s not a Bangali there” you say “ there’s some gondogol”
Bhoomi and Chandrabindoo’s music I seem to enjoy,
Tell me -which Bangaliana in me does it destroy?


Bengal has never been my home-it’s a place I go to visit.
I like its ever-changing pace, with its intelligence and wit.
I may not be the bourgeois, neither the traditional bhadralok.
I am just a Probasi Bangali, just a new branch of the old oak.

This was written a while back for the annual Durga Puja magazine .I got a lot of sneers for not getting Jibanananda. Whatever people say, I refuse to box myself in one category. At the end of the day, aren't you the person shaped by your experiences?

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

They love the term -"We are like this only"

They seem to proclaim as loud as they can.
"We are like this only-Do whatever you can."
They'll never mend their ways come what may.
They like to see themselves stagnant every day.

You must be wandering what I am talking about.
Just look around yourself,you'll find them out.
They like dancing their bulb changing Rabindrik dance.
Anything innovative puts them in a deep trance.

They seem to live in a country that was a decade back.
Anything newer than that, they seem to be taken aback.
They have immigrated from old country ages ago.
But they hold it tight, never seem to let go.

A Superbowl party catches them offguard by a mile
They would rather discuss Manoj Mitra's theater style.
The new Bangali bands seems to be a huge nonsense.
"We are like this only"-seems to be their only defence.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

A trilogy to Victorian romanticism


I started the story of my two protagonists with "A chance discovery-A gift of my lifetime" which was The Beginning, and continued with "Life goes on!" which was about The Hope. I was asked by some how this journey of my protagonists would end. Will it be a happy or a sad ending? This is what I think the ending should be. I have chosen to theme it as The Waiting and its named "The anticipation- Will we meet or won't we?". Whether its happy or sad, its for you to perceive.

A chance discovery - A gift of lifetime

As I went and sat by the sea just as I do everyday
To experience the sounds and sights of a new day
A stone I had; which I polished and threw at the sea
Wanted the sea creatures to feel its smoothness with me

So many of them popped up and said they liked it some
There was this stone who thought that it was just yum
So we talked about how we both liked well tasting stones
We both liked spicy stones, tangy stones and sweet stones

A mere stone I thought, I think it needs some polish to shine
So I asked the stone "Would you like my company to dine?"
And it said "Why not, you get the food and I'll get the wine.
And you will immensely enjoy this charming company of mine."

Thus started the slow discovery of this rough stone that I know.
I wondered " Is this stone really rough? Or is it just a show?
So I reached out my hand to get the feel of its texture
And came across a smooth feel, maybe for its kind gestures

The stone was not rough, but was tickly and made me laugh
When I hit a rough edge, it would always bring the "moony side up"
My curiosity piqued, there was something unique about this stone
It looked rough from a few angles, but for a polish, it needed none.

I asked "Do you like being how you are- Whats your little secret"
It said " I am pretty happy with the way I am- I have no regrets"
"And how did you turn so smooth?" asked my ever inquisitive mind
"Oh I was a tough cannonball before, left many a fire behind"

"But that didn't get me anywhere, life has taught me a few lessons
Some at home, some with my family, and a few even in the legions
I have withstood many a thunderbolt that life has thrown at me
Took a few hits myself, some to the heart and some physically"

Then I realized: This was just no ordinary rough edged stone
I very "much like"d this one ,who had a shine of its own
So I started to probe more, to see if I could get to know it more
And the more I touched and felt it, the more it touched me to core.

There were some cracks on it, coz it had got some raw deals
You see, I know how to take care of stones and wanted it to heal
If you think I was the stone's caregiver, I would say you are wrong
Because as the stone started healing, I too would heal along

As I discover the stone each day, I have finally come to realize.
This one's a keeper, but it will take it some time to acclimatize.
I don't want to hold hard, lest it would crumble into fine dust
I just need to nurture it some, and it will soon become robust

But I accept the stone as it is, like a package of damaged goods
The wounds will heal and soon it will emerge from the backwoods
Until then, I will take care, nurture and nourish it with all my heart
Have found my rare gem, will never let go and never let it fall apart.

"Tomorrow will be another day"-What did Scarlett mean by that? Was it her indomitable strength that made her say those words? People say that she was not going to worry about what happened and take care of it tomorrow.I think she was trying to say "No one is indispensable." And its time to move on as life will surely help us heal over heartbreaks, over passing away of our beloved. As Leann Rimes would sing " Life goes on, and its only gonna make me strong". So here's to all the Scarlett O'Haras of this world, including me, who will persevere in spite of what life throws at them.

LIFE GOES ON!

You want to leave, vanish for ever-"Sure, be my guest"
I will not give in and am not willing to be your conquest.
You think I will yearn for you, and let my life wither away
You are so wrong- for me "Tomorrow will be another day"

Life is a combination of sweet and sorrowful times we have
I will get over you and face the world like I always have
Have survived a few heartaches; one more won't make me sway
Will get over this one too- for me "Tomorrow will be another day"

As Leann sings "Life goes on", I will sing along with her too
No one is indispensable; I will continue my life without you.
It might be tough, but I will wake up and survive each day
Its going to be fine dear- for me "Tomorrow will be another day"

The time that I spent with you will always be memorable for me.
As you say " You leave an etch, I will take you to my pyre with me"
No hard feelings here, as we were never meant to be together anyway
I will savor these memories- for me "Tomorrow will be another day"

So here I say to you, "Goodbye my friend, may life be good to you"
"May God give you strength to face all the crap life throws at you"
You are a survivor and I promise to write your life's story some day.
You just have to turn back and ask- for me "Tomorrow will be another day"

I think the line from Chandrabindoo's song is very apt here.
Jodi bolo ari, tomakeo chhede jete pari-If you want to part ways, I can leave you too.

See, its not so bad after all. Life is good. Life is interesting. The sun is shining and the glass is still half full.
And that brings us to the final destination.But is it a destination or the journey that keeps us going, that makes our hearts go pitter patter?Maybe its both.

The anticipation- Will we meet or won't we?

its another friday night and am coming home...
i started thinking abt u so i wrote this poem....
reminiscing of the ways u held me and the way we kissed ....
i could go on for days but all would still be missed.....

someone like u a best friend one of a kind,,,,,,,
there is no other way to put it u are my perfect find....
together at last cause we have waited so long.
i still feel u with me even though u are alone.....

sunsets and sunrises are what get me through....
all this waiting builds up there is notting i can do.....
as april diminishes may becomes memories of the past..
our future unfold and the time has come its june at last....

i have been waiting so long just for a glimpse of ur eyes......
the way u look at me and make me melt inside.....
the waiting is over and the moment is finally here......
july is graduation as i tremble with fear...

as august passes by, the summer seems so long and drawn...
the fall colors seem faded as I lie sleepless till dawn...
october's festive season is dreary without you around me...
I spend another Thanksgiving gloomy in front of the TV...

I think the holiday season will finally bring me peace
with you decorating my tree, I will finally feel at ease
has it been a year already that has passed without you
maybe if I open my teary eyes, I will find me beside you..

however it still the same night the same tear of my face......
i wish i could hurry time as if it was a race....
i just want to see u and hold u so tight.....
make u fill with laughter and sleep with u all night.....

too bad its just another friday drive on my way home.....
still thinking abt u as i finish this poem

That ends my trilogy of Victorian romanticism. No more love for me. I would much prefer to write satire. Thank God it is over.
Take care and God bless.
Tania

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Valentine's Day-A retrospective

Note: Written for last years valentine day.

The most hyped about holiday, where $$$ or INR or any other currency gets wasted to show your significant other how special they are. Why, what were you doing on the other days, moron, drinking with buddies or busy chatting with girlfriends when your significant other wanted to do some cootchycooing. We never do anything special on this day- why should there be a time set to express affection?

V-day-An introspection

Would a candlelight dinner in a classy restuarant suffice?
Or a bunch of roses and a box from Godiva chocolatier entice?
Maybe a Hallmark card or a diamond solitaire can do the trick?
Oh you sure have innumerable choices from which to pick!!

Why do you need just a day to show your love to dear ones?
Are you too busy sitting in that corner office making millions?
Are you a jetsetter, who has to even prioritize your own kin?
Are you too short of time amongst deadlines- stretched too thin?

When you have that free time ,see things around you and introspect
Shut your laptop or magazine and think if this is even worth it
Would you spend time with the spouse or that cute child of yours?
Would you just spend some time with them by shutting the world's doors?

So my dear friend,stop and take time to smell the roses and lillies
Take time to enjoy the moment that you spent with friends and family
When you are gone , your kith and kin should like what you accomplished
Your lonely obituary shouldn't read "That person had a great corner office"

This went in my blog today after seeing all my jetsetting friends spending their entire life in offices and planes and hotels.
Happy V Day
Enjoy
Tania

What will this Valentine bring?



Note: This was written last year to commemorate our 10th Valentine.

My third Valentine gift was a poem written by my husband. Twas beautiful and it still makes me a bowlful of mush when I read it.Here's what he wrote for me.


Valentine 2000

Snow falls on the pines outside,
The air is fresh and love is in the air.
Here, my sweetheart you are so close,
Without you, I was extremely morose.
As we snuggle close to each other,
On the West Side of the Clinton river.
The magic of love is so endearing,
We hold hands and no words spoken.
Yet in a million years, we are never separate,
We travel together in the dreams of eternity.
Love for us is so unspoken, so understood,
We just held hand and watch the wood.
I may loose everything in life's race
But as long as I have you my valentine,
I will constantly float on cloud nine.
With wings you will join my quest
It will be along an endearing conquest.

So as I sit to write on this Valentine eve, I look back at the years spent together, the stolen moments, the tempestuous arguments, the making up afterwords, reminiscing the past and dreaming about the future- it has been one hell of a journey. This year is noteworthy as this is my 10th Valentine with my fellow traveller.Yes travellers we are, in search of something that will bring peace.Kind of like the mrigatrishna- will the thirst be satisfied? Here's to you Snehasis, for the rebel that you are and the sense of humor that you have, for sharing ten eventful years with me.


What will this Valentine bring?

Will this Valentine bring new awakening?
Will this bring dreams for a new beginning?
Will it hold the charm of the beginning years?
Or will it hold apprehension and unkown fears

Will you be there through tough times with me?
Or will you just shirk and shy away from me?
The road looks darker, but light seems at the end
Will we brave together, or take different bends?

Will you be my beacon and light my away?
Or will you shut the doors and stay away?
Life is tough and the journey seems tougher
Will you brave the paths by being together?

Do you think we will fulfil that dream one day?
Of taking that boat on lake Eerie and sailing away
Will you ride my Harley with me to key west?
Will you fulfill that promise of endearing conquest?

Maybe love is not so unspoken any more
Maybe love needs to be shaken to the core
Love seems to be competing with life's race
Can we chase love, Can we reembrace?

Happy V day.
Tania

A tempest rages in me- A sonnet


An old poem written in a sonnet form, finding a new place.
Agonies of a Repentant Soul!
Unforgettable, yes the night was,when we became one
I'm not sure if I took advantage of your vulnerability
Why don't I trust my heart, why is there an insecurity?
Why do I feel we have just ended everything we begun?
There's a tempest raging in my heart and my soul,
On how can I shield you from a truth thats bitter,
I want to escape from it, but I am not a quitter;
I wonder, "Can I hold you in my hands and can I console?"
Maybe you were meant to be with me, yes destiny it was.
Do I have a future with you, do I still stand a chance?
I shouldn't let my bitter past darken my beautiful present.
You have stood by me an beared the burden of all my faults
We have come to share things together,sometimes a stolen glance.
Perhaps things will be fine, perhaps there will be nothing to resent.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

I am harvesting my bagful of memories!


I think the most cherished memory of my child is when she did a somersault and said “Mama look at me!”. It just made me all mushy inside. And then the other day, when she found a colorful eraser that was dropped by someone, she had the understanding what was the right thing to do even though she was tempted to do otherwise. I think she will grow up to be a fine young lady. But until then, I will keep on making memories with her.

The Empty Nester

I held her in my arms one bright spring afternoon
Her nose crinkled, eyes closed looking like the moon
How the years ahead will shape up I am not so sure
Will I be a cool mom, or will I be a plain old bore

A year passes and the baby steps seem everywhere
If you call her, she suddenly spring from nowhere
I have done OK, have not pulled my hair off yet
Wait till she turns a teen, other parents seem to bet.

When she is two, she is a very shy baby I am told
I worry, Will she assert herself, will she be bold
But she seems so sure of herself in things she does
I push the thought away; she is having fun and is abuzz

When she is three she loves to paint on every paper
Will she learn her ABCs, will her drawings taper?
But she has an imagination vivid, just like her dad
Maybe she will turn out smart, that makes me glad

At four, she is a gymnast, she is jumping all around.
Oh no, there goes my sofa, that thought seems to hound
But when she does that somersault and says "Mamma look at me"
My heart swells up with pride, and I want everyone to see.

She turned five a few months back, she skates and swims
She dances like a dream, but she still wants to go to the gym
Her teachers tell me, that her perseverance amazes them
I wonder "Why not, she is after all my precious little gem."

I think I am a blessed with a child that seems to enjoy.
Everything that she does, even be it her imaginary toy
The years seems to go by, I can't seem to hold them back
More time is what I need, time is what I seem to lack

So if you come to my home and see things a little haywire
Its just that I am enjoying my baby before I plan to retire
One day you will surely see things all pretty in their place
But then I will be an empty nester, the bird has left the nest.

My little princess, here’s a song that always remind me of you.

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes
I love you, always.
Mamma

Friday, January 11, 2008

Apurva Agnihotri-कुछ कुछ होता है

I have rarely seen Apoorva in the past except for Pardes and the drunken Armaan days. I got interested when I saw the arrogant Dev Pratap Singh -maybe because he reminds me of Mr.Darcy- my favorite hero from the teenage days. I am also watching Jassi these days and find that he portrays a different kind of arrogance as Armaan Suri. And I discovered recently from my long conversations with Ananya-who claims to be his biggest fan-that he writes poetry.And maybe that's when I connected to my favorite actor this season. As he turns n years old(I really don't know) today- Here's to Apoorva Agnihotri.

What's hidden beneath those eyes?

The lad from Kanpur decided to fly high
To become a pilot and soar through the skies.
Fate brought him to the world of entertainment
A place where his dad has many accomplishments

He featured as a rich brat in Mukta arts Creation
Was welcomed by desis and pardesis from all nations
He thought "This is a good start to get my feet wet"
"I am in the limelight, but have I arrived yet?"

So he worked hard on a few movie ventures
They were Ok but nothing was the clincher
So after a career of unsuccessful movies
He decided to step in the world of TV

The soap watchers discovered the Armaan Suri
जिसे देखे बिना किसी कि नींद होती नही पूरी
Though Jassi was the darling of everyone's eye
But when they laid eyes on Armaan, they let out a sigh

They followed the arrogant Casanova for a year
And supported him through his insecurities and fears
When he chose to dream big, they dreamt with him too
When his eyes talked, the viewers appreciation grew.

But then he did something that broke everyone's heart
He found his significant other and tied the sacred knot
The darling man of the nation was hitched for sure
So all the ladies tagged Armaan in search for their cure

Well Jassi was fine, but everyone loved to talk about Armaan
And they analyzed high and low, this प्यारा सा खोया सा इंसान
They followed him to Naintal, Goa and even to Kuala Lumpur
To follow a story that the audience loved to the core.

And now he comes to us as the recluse Dev Pratap Singh
With a new role, different emotions his character brings
But his eyes are the same, and volumes they speak.
The panorama of emotions makes the audience go weak.

The romance, the passion,the pain portrayed in his eyes
Has helped the introvert star reach for the new highs
These eyes will speak behind the camera one day
And I am sure then too, they will have a lot to say.

Here's wishing Apoorva a very Happy Birthday. May all your dreams come true. A poet at heart will surely have beautiful stories to tell.
Best wishes
Tania

Monday, December 3, 2007

Happy Birthday Iqbal


No I am not talking about the movie Iqbal, neither am I talking about the poet Iqbal who penned "Sare jahaan se accha". I am an ex-pat who is not so much into cricket. The only thing I like to do is watch the idiot box. I am talking about the latest craze that has hit the Indian TV watching female population- Iqbal Khan who plays rock star Angad Khanna in Kekta produced "Kaisa Yeh Pyar Hai". He turns 26 on Feb 10th. Please don't laugh people when I say I am a big fan. Yes, I am a big fan of his acting, his work commitment, his struggle to be successful and his commitments to his family and his ladylove. So here's something for you, our dear IQ.

He came, He saw, Has he conquered yet?

He came so far away from Heavenly Kashmir
To aamchi Mumbai to test his acting ki taqdeer
He came with a heart full of starry dreams
To take the entertainment world in full steam

Although he came to become a great actor
He tried his hands in modeling, as he had the X –Factor
He also danced some zigs in music albums
Maybe it was part of his acting curriculum

And then he entered the world of cinema
And acted in Fun2oosh with Paresh and Raima
And then there was the movie that was called Bullet
Where the international terrorists were his prime target

The road was tough, the successes were few
And he wondered if he was already through
With this big and shiny world of entertainment.
Or was this just the beginning of his achievements

And then one fine day, he was discovered by Balaji
To be a hotshot rockstar on a musical on Sony TV
So finally the world saw what he wanted it to see
A great actor and not just a wannabe

And so the TVs exploded on Sony's prime time
And thus began Iqbal's upward climb
A show that took young India by storm
With a star that could actually perform

When he was the rockstar with his attitude
Everyone was charmed by this cool dude
And when he stared from the TV with those bedroom eyes
His females fans hearts went just sigh sigh

And when he cried for his unborn heir
Everyone's eyes were filled with tears
And when his heart pined for revenge
Everyone wanted the villain in the shooting range

He showed the world a panorama of emotions
And hence his fans showed him their ardent devotion
Ekta's golden goose has truly unfurled
Yes he has definitely conquered the entertainment world.

It has been a pretty succesful year for him and I am sure he will have many more years to come.Good luck Iqbal and keep up the good work.
Adios
Tania

PS: Scribed on Wednesday, February 08, 2006

And thus spake Ms.Seusstry

Yes my Marketing Prof. Has coined the term Ms.Seusstry for me- a combination of Dr.Seuss and an Indian name Shastry. So I thought I would make the name official with this post. This was my first attempt at writing something. So when I win that literary prize in the future (wink wink) maybe this will become famous too.

This is based on a very famous K soap
1.Naina-The matriarch, she wears her hair up in a funny bun.
2.Angad-son of Naina, a rock star, who cannot dance., the male lead.
3.Kripa-She lives in Angad’s outhouse, sings opposite him and is the female lead.
4.Mishti- Angad’s family friend, Naina wants Angad to marry Mishti as she is rich.
5.Dadi-Naina’s MIL,
6.Kartik-Older son of Naina, jealous of Angad’s fame.
7.Anitaah-Angad’s cousin
8.Harshini-Kripa’s childhood friend, who hates Kripa these days.
9.Prithvi-Mishti’s brother, in love with Kripa

Naina In The Bun
(Inspired by The Cat in the Hat –By Dr.Seuss)

The sun did not shine.
It was too dark to see.
So we sat in the outhouse.
The power was out, you see.

I snuggled there with Kripa.
We kissed there, we two.
And I said, ”How I wish,
We had something to do!”


Too dark to dance a zig.
Too silent to break into a song.
So we snuggled in the outhouse.
And we did DING DONG!


So all we could do was to
DING!
DONG!
DING!
DONG!
And we liked it so much.
That we broke into a song.


KNOCK!
And then there was a knock!
How that knock made us go in a shock!
We looked!
Then we saw the BUN!
We LOOKED!
And we saw HER!
My mom NAINA IN HER BUN!
And she said to us,
“HOW DARE YOU TWO HAVE FUN!”


“I know you were having fun.
With your sweet little honey.
But we can’t do that ,
As we need lots of MONEY!”


“I know someone with lots of dough,”
Said my mom Naina the Hun.
“I know some new tricks”
Said Naina in her Bun.
“A lot of good tricks,
To get you this new honey,
This new honey of yours,
With lots of money.”


Then Kripa and I,
Did not know what to do.
Our Dadi was out of town.
Bothered by Naina’s hairdo.


But my sis Aaliyah said “No! No!
Make that Naina Masi go!
Tell that Naina in the Bun,
You do not want any dough!
She should not be here,
In your sweet little mush room.
She should not be here,
When your romance is in full bloom!”


“Now! Now! Have no fear.
Have no fear!” said Naina.
“My tricks are not bad.
I will not turn you into a Maina.
Why, we can have.
Lots of dough, if you chose.
With a game that I call,
“The Trapping of Mishti Bose.”


“Trapping of Mishti Bose!” said Aaliyah.
“This will not work at all!
“Trapping of Mishti Bose!” said my cousin,
“Do you wish to bring our downfall?”


“Have no fear,” said my Mom.
“I will not let the plan fail.
I will set Angad as a bait,
To trap that big Mishti whale.”


“Me as a BAIT!” said I,
“This is no fun at all.”
“When I have Kripa with me,
Why do I need Mishti the boar, after all.”


“How can you say that?” said Mom,
“Mishti is not a boar,
“How can you not marry her?
She has agreed to pay 45 crores.”


“WOW, 45 CRORES!” said I,
“That’s a lot of dough!
But can you tell me,
Why so much money do I owe?”


“That’s a long story”
Said Naina in her Bun.
“When you were having fun,
With your sweet little honey.
Boski came and sued us,
For all this money.”


“I have no fear,” thought my mom,
“I have some tricks of my own.
I will not let this Kripa,
This honey of yours, bring us down.
As I stand in my Satrangi living room.
With this MMS on my phone.
I have a plan now.
To bring Kripa down.”


“Look at me now!” said Naina the Hun,
“With this trick of emotional blackmail.
I can drag my son to Goa.
And he will follow me like a tail.”


But that is not all!
Oh, no.
That is not all…
“Look at me!
Look at me!
Look at me now!
I can still hook up Angad and Mishti,
Without Angad finding out anyhow.


“I should strike when the iron is hot.
And sweet talk Mishti in tying the knot
I can send Mishti to Goa and Lukhnow.
To accompany Angad who is practicing Twae-kwan-do.
I will trap Angad into marrying Mishti the Mose(In Bengali means buffalo).
So that he can stop tasting mangoes from Kripa’s nose.”


“I can pretend to faint.
For our big financial loss.
I can make my son guilty,
To show him who is the boss.”


“I can drag him to the Bose House.
For Mishti’s birthday by the pool.
And if he wants to bring Kripa along,
I can tell him,” That’s not cool!”


This is what my mom planned,
For her big financial gain.
But she has not anticipated,
That her plan would go down the drain.


Mishti was in Goa with us,
To supervise our video shoot, you see.
She was in for a surprise,
When see saw me necking Kripa by the sea.


She did not like it,
Me necking Kripa by the sea,
She kept thinking,
“What is happening to me?”
“Why am I falling apart?
By seeing them so close?
I want my Angad back,
After all I AM MISHTI BOSE!”


We did not know what was going on
In fat Mishti’s head.
Kripa and I were too busy,
In painting Goa red.


But Mishti was hatching plans to be Mrs.Angad Khanna,
She did not want her plans to fail.
She started thinking along the lines,
Of Naina in the Bun, her would be M-I-L.


She knew I was sick,
And had to get back home at the earliest.
She booked Kripa in a late flight.
So that she could break our love nest.


She charged into Khanna House,
All fuming and hot.
She said to my Mom, “Do I like this?
Oh, no! I do not.
You know your son Angad,
Was having fun with his sweet little hun.
Why did you drag me into this?
You ,Naina in the Bun!”


“I do not like it ,
Not one little bit.
I will get back my Angad,
I am not a nitwit.
I will get back my Angad,
Coz I am smart and funny,
And on top of that,
I have all this money”


“Oh, I like what I hear,
Let that Kripa rot in hell!”
Said the Naina in the Bun
To her would be D-I-L.
“ I can help you with this,
I do not wish you to go!
And so,” said Naina in the Bun,
“So
so
So……
I will show you
Another good trick that I know!”


And then she went in.
Glaring at her henpecked spouse.
My mom Naina in the Bun
Came back with the Fox and the Mouse. (Kartik and Harshini)


They were followed by the fat gorilla,
That Anitaah- the crook.
“Now look at this trick,”
Said my mom, ”Take a look!”


Then she sat down,
On her parrot green couch.
To match her parrot green sari.
And her parrot green blouse.


She looked at everyone
With her heavily made up eyes.
Said Naina in the Bun
“I have a big surprise”


“Let us break up these lovebirds,
Before their romance is known,
With a trick that I call
KILLING-TWO-BIRDS-WITH ONE-STONE”


“I have a master game plan,
That will not need a knife,
To separate that poor Kripa from,
Your darling Angad’s life.”


“I will tell you what the plan is,
To make Angad your spouse,
For that I will need this group of three,
The Gorilla, The Fox and The Mouse.”


This three will help us,
In executing my plan, you see.
Don’t underestimate them by their looks,
They are very smart, this cunning group of three.


That fat chimp is very shrewd,
A lot of smart ideas she knows,
Though she may look like a fashion faux pas,
Trying to fit her size 20 body into size 4 clothes.


And oh the Fox!
The cunning, cunning fox,
What do I say about this child of mine?
He is as smart as me, you see,
After all, he is my own design.


And the mouse,
Don’t underestimate the mouse.
She is the big traitor,
Of our cute enemy in the outhouse.


So Mishti the whale was not sure,
If she should shake hands with these three.
She wanted her Angad back.
After all, SHE WAS MISHTI BOSE, you see.


She shook hands with the trio,
But her bro Prithvi said “No! No!
I can’t let the terrible trio hurt my darling,
Don’t join hands with them! Make them go!


“You should not be in cahoots with them,
When your brother is not!
Even though Kripa is not in love with me!
Don’t know why she finds Angad so hot”


“ I too have muscles like him,
And I am also a gana gane wala,
Though Angad may be a rockstar,
He still needs the voice of Kunal Ganjawala!”


“Have no fear, big bro,”
Said the big Mishti Whale.
“When Angad ditches Kripa,
On your shoulders she will wail!
Let us use this terrible trio,
I know they are smart,
And devious and cunning,
They will help us get back our sweethearts.”


So the trio started their game
Of ruining our love story.
They sent the mouse to Kripa.
To narrate her fake sob story.


Said the mouse “I was sad and gloomy
And I had my own doubts,
On why Prithvi chose you.
Over my pretty snout.


So I looked for you in Khanna House.
And cried on the shoulders of the foxy chap.
But somehow we ended up doing DING DONG,
While someone clicked our snaps.


Now this someone is blackmailing me
To shed twenty five lakhs,
Oh from where will I get that money!
Oh I want those pictures back!”


As you know my darling Kripa,
She would protect her friend,
“I can help you”, said she,
“But I don’t have that money to lend”


“Let us call the foxy chap,
And ask him for the money,
We will get you out of this soup
Don’t you worry, dear Harshini”


Thus my Mom started the game
After all, She was an EVIL THINKER
And my darling fell for it.
All hook line and sinker.


So she said to the sneaky fox
“How dare you do DING DONG?
Without falling in love,
Don’t you know its just wrong”


The Fox gave her a smirk,
And agreed to give her the dough
And while he was signing the check,
Our Chimp taped the video


And what happened next,
If you would like to find out
Any K soap on the horizon
Is all you have to check out.

SUPERBOWL XL- Is Detroit ready?

Commuting in Michigan is one of the toughest things after LA due to year around construction. To top it off if you are commuting to Downtown Detroit on the Super Bowl week, it adds up to your owes. So here are my thoughts on a tough game and Motown's effort to show it to the rest of USA that we too can host a national event. (No I am too much of a cosmopolitan to think that Super Bowl is a world event just because it is played in US of A)

The Quirks of Super Bowl XL

As I try to traverse through Detroit's semi closed streets
I see Detroit trying its best to turn itself into a Super Bowl retreat.
The streets are decorated with gigantic heated tents.
With the RJ on the radio calling it a world event.

The Steelers have come to battle the Seahawks
While Motown tries it best to shine up the sidewalks
Snow cannons are being used to make the snow slides fast
As Detroit also wants to host the annual Winterblast.

In the past years I have come to understand the American football
Though there are only a few times the foot actually hits the ball.
It’s a game that involves the brawn more than the brain.
But even then the Detroit Lions always seem to go down the drain.

I do not know much about the contending teams.
But looks like the nerdy city of Seattle also has a good football team
The only thing that I know about the Pittsburgh Steelers
Is that their quarterback's name resembles a BK Quarterpounder.

Just five more days left for the opening pitch
Am hoping that the event goes off well without any glitch
I am not sure how much more can I endure
Of slow traffics, closed streets and long detours.

I see the giant football arches from my office window
And also six snow cannons trying to make a lot of snow.
I am charmed by how a game can change a whole city
Our Motown is all dressed up for the hoity toity.

So welcome one, welcome all, to our beautiful Motown, with its Greektown restaurants and its beautiful casinos, the city of beautiful cars and the host of Super Bowl XL.

Until next time.
Tania
PS:This was scribed in Jan 2006 before SuperBowl XL

Sunday, November 11, 2007

The Thinks that Kekta Thinks

After watching many episodes of Balaji's and Kekta Kapoor (I hope I have spelled it right according to her numerology), I have come to the conclusion that soaps are soaps after all, as slippery and as slimy as where you put them for display.So here is to Kekta Kapoor( my business role model)


The Thinks that Kekta Thinks
(Based on Dr.Seuss' The Thinks You Can Think)

Kekta can think up some good stories, that’s what she can do.
Then she puts in her twists and turns, and she turns them into strange weirdoes.
She can think up her titles to start with the letter K
That letter will bring her success that’s what Sunita Menon has to say.

Oh the plots that she thinks up with 5 marriages and 10 divorces.
If that does not work, then her twists take the soap on a different course.
To save money, the same artist in several serials does she employ!
To top it off she kills the characters if they turn into naughty boys.

She draws up long contracts so that her actors don’t run away.
After all, who can tolerate her idiosyncrasies night and day!
She thinks about how her soaps should cater to middle class.
Is ghisi piti morality par akhir kise hoga vishwas?

She thinks of plots, which involve stupid kitchen politics
Of who can cook the better biryani? Or who has a better sense of ethics?
She thinks of her casts as rich middle-aged house wives.
Who don't have a brain to do something meaningful with their lives.

The women folk in her soaps are laden with expensive jewelry.
They also wear designer saris in their kitchen cooking chicken curry.
And when they are finished cooking their husband’s favorite baingan bharta
They poison their husband’s minds when he is back home changing into his kurta.

When she wanted Balaji to go beyond the viewers of Viranis and Agarwals
She thinked up love stories for young folks like that of Kashish and Sujal Garewal.
These soaps have different twist, which involves intense love and jealousies
Which involves rapes, betrayals and murders-Oh why can't Kekta leave her legacy?

Now she has thought up some new thinks that will cater to different audience
But please call them Candy Floss and Crimson Skies-me tired of this K nonsense.
Her first soap called "Hum Paanch" did not have to start with the letter K
Maybe that's why it was a hit-Kekta should think about it some day.


This is my first effort and blogging and letting the world know about my nonsensical efforts.
Au revoir!
Tania